The Vision Quest – Part 2

Here it is; the post I have been dreading and putting off publishing. I know my grand total of debt owed. I am shocked by the amount, I didn’t know it would be so high. I am embarrassed to announce this. I know that I have family members and friends reading this blog and it is making me ill to admit it to the world. However, I know that this is the first step. I’m admitting that I have a serious problem. Right?

Before I get to the total amount I owe, let me take a walk down memory lane and tell you how I got to where I am. It all begin in college. It was around 1994 and I was a poor college student. I was working about 15-20 hours a week making minimum wage. I didn’t have a lot of bills but I had a need for some items. I can remember my first credit card and what I bought the first time I used it. It was an AT&T Universal Visa Card and I purchased a Huffy Mountain bike for use at school. I attended a very large school and needed to get from one end of the campus to the next. The bike was an excellent buy, IF I had paid more than the minimum and not charged anything new. That did not happen.

College progressed, more credit cards were acquired and I contracted the shopping bug. Suddenly I could go to the mall, find anything I wanted and hand a plastic card over to the employee and suddenly I had that item. The problem was, I did this too often and wasn’t making enough money to pay anything more than the minimum payments.

After college, I moved home and lived with my mom while working as a teacher. With that income I was able to pay down a good chunk of my debt. If only I had cut up the cards and not charged anything else.

I moved out on my own and began the cycle of charge too much and spend months paying it down and then turning around and charging it up again.

I met the man I was going to be married at a time when I had very little debt. He paid for anything I wanted and eventually we moved in together and then married. As a childless couple, we both worked and made plenty of money. We didn’t have to charge anything. And then I got pregnant.

I had my first son in January of 2003 and I was in love! There was no way I was going to be able to send him to daycare and let someone else raise him. So it was decided that I would become a stay at home mom; bye-bye half of our income. This could have worked for us, had we planned for it. Instead we continued to live like we had twice the income we had. We SHOULD have been able to live on his income alone, if we were smart. We were not.

Years progressed, a couple of part-time jobs were acquired on my part, another son was born and our debt increased. By 2007 we were in debt to the tune of about $35,000 and my husband lost his job. It was a long 8 months before I realized he was lying about his job hunt and I took things into my own hands. I got a full time job that didn’t pay enough, but it helped. And then tragedy happened.

One day my husband put the safety of our children at risk and I knew it was time to leave. We had been having problems for years, this just sealed the deal. I left with $1000.00 and about $7000.00 in debt. I made the decision to move two hours away and into my mother’s home. This meant leaving my job. This proved to be a poor decision.

Those who have gone through a rough divorce know, it’s NOT cheap! I paid a lot of money to that attorney and it was worth it. However, my debt suffered and increased.

One factor that I never considered when deciding to move was the economy of the town I was moving to. The job situation was horrible. I went months without offers and when two came in, they were for $10.00 an hour. I knew there was no way I could live on that so I passed on them in the hopes of something better coming along. That never happened. Finally 6months later, I took another job at $10.00 an hour. After working there for four months, it became clear that I was about to lose most of my hours. I was angry about not being given notice by this and I left. Again, not a wise decision as I have not found anything since.

I should also state that I made some extremely selfish and unwise choices during the fall of 2008 and summer of 2009. You see, I am a huge fan of the group New Kids on the Block (more than half of you are saying “well DUH!”). I went to a concert in October 2008 and met them. Suddenly I was obsessed with seeing them again and meeting them even more. For those who are wondering, “why?” I’m not sure I could explain it to you but I will try. As a fan of the largest group ever, back in the late 80s and early 90s, they were unattainable. Only the lucky of the luckiest got to meet them or even have great seats at one of their concerts. The last time I saw them in concert it was 1990 and I was in the very last row. It was a stadium show and I was probably a mile away from them. The next time I saw them it was 2008 and I not only met them, but I had third row, dead center seats! To say I was hooked would be an understatement. So nine months and nine concerts later I had been to several cities that required flying and all required expensive tickets. I met them a number of times, made a dozen new and WONDERFUL new friends and even had some experiences that no other fan has or ever will have. And then the bills started coming in and I actually paid attention to them rather then put them aside and plan my next concert.

This has gotten quite long….more to come, I promise.
DP

Tags: Credit Cards, The Past